I ended up being in this piss ass mood the past day or two, for various reason, that I probably won’t discuss on here. My choice, and that’s that.

I’ve been busy packing, spending some time on MSN, going out, doing this and that. Y’know, the usual stuff, etc. to get my mind off things. Reason: trying not to reflect on the past week. No matter how much I tried, though, things never seemed to slip my mind. They always seemed to return after the day was drawing to an end.

I had a wonderful week with a nice ending, but I ended up getting mixed feelings about certain events that took place. Not entirely my fault. I still seem to be drawing myself more towards the negative, and I know it’s not good. Maybe I am wrong, and I should be drawing myself more towards the positive, but, right now, it doesn’t feel right. I have no idea anymore, and I all do is wonder. I wonder how things will change, and what, if anything, will come from this change.

I have never believed in anything more strongly than what I believe about myself right now. I am who I am, and if you don’t like it then too bad. I most certainly am not going to change my ways simply to satisfy something that is not real, or doesn’t feel real. Don't get me wrong. Some change it good, but at this point and time I just don't know.

Anyway, I am done ranting about hopeless dreams. I received an email from an amazing friend this morning, and he had left me with a quote that really appealed to me.

“You gain strength, courage, and confidence by every experience in which you stop and look fear in the face..."

There are so many thing in life that I am yet to accomplish and experience, but I guess it will all come together in time. The truth is I am tired of waiting, and I do think it is time to look fear in the face. It’s time I become more of a take charge woman. Possibly with some help from others... :S

I guess i should get going now. I am off to Newfoundland on Friday, so I’ll see how things are when I get back. I’m probably guessing not much better, but that’s okay. Nothing I can’t handle.

~Lots of Love~

Lori ¶ 9:51 PM